 “To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness.” ~Robert Morley This week’s quote is a reminder that self-love is the key to living a happy, healthy existence. However, this quote also leaves a lot to be desired. Suggesting that you need to fall in love with yourself in order to be happy implies a kind of forced self-infatuation. But self-love is not the same thing as vanity. It's not about gazing adoringly at your own reflection, it’s about treating yourself with kindness and respect.
Is it even possible to be in love with yourself? To do so, you would first need to divide yourself into two equal halves: one half of you that is giving love, and the other half that’s receiving it. However, you can’t just split yourself in two because, as we have discussed in previous blogs, you are one. But, if you are indeed one, then how exactly are you supposed to love yourself? Simply by recognizing that you are, essentially, the energy of love- the same loving energy that created this world and everyone in it. Ram Dass once described love not as a fleeting emotion but as a fundamental way of being. “This love is actually part of you,” he explained, “it’s always flowing through you. It’s like the subatomic texture of the universe.” He explained that being present to this love is like “relaxing endlessly into a warm bath that surrounds and supports your every movement so that every thought and feeling is permeated by it.” So, breathe easily and relax into the loving energy that is always present inside your being. When it comes to happiness, the love that radiates from your own heart is what matters, not the love that comes to you from the outside. By cultivating self-love, you learn to fill your own cup. Only when your cup is full can you share your love freely with others.
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 “Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” ~Rumi This week’s quote has the potential to completely transform your life. Many of us have reached a certain level of understanding regarding the true nature of reality. At some point, you may have believed that you could change the world, if only you could convince all of humanity to get on board with your ideas. However, this kind of thinking is missing the point. Ultimately, it’s not about changing the world, it’s about changing yourself.
Enlightenment, or awakening to the truth about life, can be compared to a blind man who suddenly regains his sight. The world at large would be unaffected by this turn of events- everyone else would continue living their lives as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. The only difference being that the formally blind man is now able to perceive his reality with much more clarity. Similarly, reaching a higher understanding about your existence does not necessarily change your reality, it simply allows you to navigate it more effectively. Many of us are operating under the false assumption that, once we awaken to the truth about our existence, all our problems and frustrations will disappear. But the world doesn’t stop coming at you just because you see it more clearly. You will still need to deal with the various inconveniences and adversities of life, no matter what personal epiphanies you come to. Since changing the world isn’t an option, the best thing you can do is change yourself. Life will invariably present challenges, there’s nothing you can do about that. All you can really do is change the way that you react to those challenges. It’s not that your life suddenly becomes free of difficulties, it’s that you learn how to create a sense of ease inside your being wherever you go. So, let go of the idea that you need to bring the world into harmony and focus instead on maintaining harmony within.  “Suppose time is a circle, bending back on itself. The world repeats itself, precisely, endlessly.” ~Alan Lightman This week’s quote makes a great point about the cyclical nature of experience. The fact is, time does not stand still, it flows. We like to think of time as flowing like a river, constantly moving and changing and adapting to the landscape as it makes its way to the sea. However, time is less like a natural river and more like the “Lazy River” that you would find at the local waterslide park (the one where you float around endlessly in a giant circle).
There is a certain cadence to the way time passes, to the way that the years come and go. But, don’t forget that this cadence is the direct result of the Earth floating around in a giant circle. In fact, our whole concept of time is linked to the movement of our planet. After all, if the Earth were to suddenly stop all movement and be perfectly still, time would also appear to be standing still. We would all be stuck living in the eternal now, with only our clocks to tell us how much time has gone by. So, is time really flowing or is it going in circles? Why can’t it be both- like some kind of flowing circle? Better yet, maybe we ought to think of the passage of time as a spiral. Because, even though you find yourself once again at the beginning of a new year, things are not exactly the same as they were a year ago. Therefore, keep on spiraling! Whether you find yourself on a downward spiral or an upward spiral this year remains to be seen. As long as you continue to grow and expand as time goes by, you should be ok. |
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About The AuthorNick Hughes is a massage therapist, yoga instructor and co-owner of Well Being. Influenced by the ideas of Alan Watts, Eckhart Tolle, Ram Dass, and Deepak Chopra, Nick presents his unique take on human existence with the goal of helping others live a happier life. Archives
December 2025
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